by Nightstick
To look at David “standing guard” over the casket you'd think it was
just any other afternoon at work. He was dressed as usual - his dark, form fitting
suit, white pressed shirt, perfectly positioned tie. He appeared - for all intents
and purposes - to just be working. Anyone unfamiliar with him would not notice
the underlying tension to his muscles, the way he clutched his hands together
to keep them from flailing about of their own accord, the brief moments near
sobbing he tried to hide so well. Actually - his own family was too unfamiliar
with David to notice these things.
This was no ordinary wake. The body in the casket was Nathaniel Fisher Sr. - David's father. His mother (Ruth), older brother (Nate Jr.) and younger sister (Claire) were all present and in true form. Ruth - trying to maintain her composure while crumbling inside (one can certainly see where David gets these traits), Nate - unfamiliar to the whole process and even to his family, Claire - surveying all who entered the funeral home, making caustic remarks in her own incomparable fashion. They'd left all the arrangements to David - all the details, all the planning, all the “doing”. And they left him standing next to his father's casket alone.
None of them noticed his pain, his turmoil, his impending explosion. But why would they? None of them had noticed him for a long time - - - years perhaps.
There was one person who would have seen all he was struggling to hide, and more. One person who would take David's trembling body into their arms and tell him “it will all be okay.” Of course - David had told Keith not to come, that he'd manage fine on his own, that he didn't need him. “What the hell were you thinking?” David was screaming to himself. “So they find out you have a boyfriend?? At least you' d have someone to lean on. How could you be so stupid, you fucking moron!!??” David was so busy berating himself he never noticed the policeman walking towards him. Of course - everyone else had noticed him. How could you not notice him? He was beautiful. Broad shouldered, smoldering eyes, bald, black. Perhaps it was because of the uniform, or maybe it was that he was so strikingly handsome or maybe that he was one of the few black men there. More than likely it was the determination in his gait - he appeared to be a man who would not be deterred from reaching his goal. His eyes were fixed on David, he noticed no other person in the room. Like with David, nobody noticed the underlying tension in his muscles, the uncertainty in his face. David had told him not to come, that he didn't need him, didn't want him there. He didn't know what reaction to expect from David.
“David?” He said softly. Startled, David jerked his head around and
recognized the face that went with the familiar voice. So many thoughts ran
thru David's head - shock, love, fear, elation, despair and panic. All he could
manage was an almost shrill “Keith??” Keith reached to touch David's
arm, but David had regained his composure and backed away. “What are you
doing here?” “I came to pay my respects to your father. And I needed
to make sure you were okay,” Keith whispered. “I'm fine. I thought
I told you not to come,” David snapped.
With that, Ruth approached the couple. “David, I'd like to see your father
now,” she said. “Of course,” David replied. She was apparently
the only person to not have noticed Keith standing there, until just that moment.
Looking confused, Ruth asked if there was a problem. “No, Mom, this is
my friend, Keith. We play racquetball together,” David explained. “Nice
to meet you Mrs. Fisher,” Keith said and offered his hand. The two shook
hands very briefly and Ruth could only comment that she had not known David
was friends with a cop (in the back of her mind was the addition - a black man!).
David proceeded to walk with Ruth to the casket, leaving Keith behind as though
he were merely an acquaintance.
A short time had passed - David tending to whatever needed to be done, all the while the tension threatening to make him scream. Keith had made his way to one of the draped, “private” rooms on either side of the main room, wanting to stay for David but not wanting him to be uncomfortable. Keith was sitting on the couch in the room when David ran in, pulling the drapes tightly closed behind him. Keith started to get up but David practically ran to the couch, sat down almost on top of him and started to cry. Keith pulled David into his arms. David buried his face in Keith' s shoulder. He was sobbing uncontrollably now - all his anguish coming to the surface. “Sshhhhh, baby,” Keith whispered to David - all the while thinking how glad he was he hadn't left earlier. “God, Keith, I don' t think I can do this,” David mumbled. “It will all be over soon,” Keith replied. David stopped himself from crying but could not stop his body from trembling. It felt so good to be in Keith's strong arms, to feel Keith' s hand rubbing his back, Keith's lips brushing his forehead. He looked into his lover's eyes and before he could think about it and stop himself, he pressed into Keith's hard body and kissed him. “I' m sorry I was such a jerk to you before. Thank you for staying.” David said. Before Keith could answer, David kissed him again. A long, deep, tender kiss that Keith felt in his soul.
While all he wanted to do was lay David down on that couch and make love to him - he realized they could be discovered at any time. “David,” Keith said, “what about . . .” Before he could finish David almost yelled: “I don' t care! Let them find us. I don't care anymore who knows.” With that he pushed Keith further back into the couch and began kissing him more impatiently. Keith knew David would come to his senses soon enough, but he would enjoy this while he could. He wrapped his arms around David and pulled him on top of his body. They continued to explore each other's mouths with their anxious tongues and each other's bodies with equally anxious hands.
“Keith,” David moaned, “Take off that goddamn gun belt, it's
killing me.” Keith obliged and the belt hit the floor. David' s suit coat
quickly followed. They had both stood up to remove said items and were both
aware of the other's growing erection. Keith was willing to stop there and let
things calm down - to avoid any possible discovery by family or guests, but
David was not. David pushed Keith against the wall with such force that he was
certain the pictures hanging on the other side of the wall would hit the floor.
He didn't care!!! The realization that, at this moment he did not care who discovered
them was unimaginable to David.
The revelation was all David needed - he held Keith's hands to the wall and
pressed his body fully against his lover's. “David?” Keith stammered.
He wasn't sure what the hell was going thru David' s mind now, what to expect.
All he knew was that his erection was becoming full fledged enormous and either
they were going to do something about it or they needed to stop right now. “David,”
Keith managed with more strength this time. “Keith, just shut up and let
me,” David said. Keith freed his hands from David's grip and grabbed David's
face. “David - look at me - are you sure about what you are doing? Cuz
we either need to stop right now or you need to do something about that,”
Keith said as he looked down to the erection threatening to rip his pants wide
open. David smiled and kissed Keith hard, biting on his full lower lip. “I'm
sure,” David said. He turned Keith around, hard, so he faced the wall -
“Damn, David, you're gonna snap my dick off if you push me up against this
wall again!” David chuckled and unzipped Keith pants, pushing them down
to his knees, setting his enormous erection free. “I certainly wouldn't
want to do that!”
Keith moans at the release of his cock and at David's hand reaching around to
grab it. As David begins stroking him gently, Keith bumps his ass back and forth
against David' s erection, straining hard against his own pants. Keith reaches
back to unzip David's pants, which fall to his knees, push David' s underwear
down just enough to pull his cock out, caressing it when his ass is not bumping
into it. David is stroking Keith more insistently - pausing occasionally to
squeeze, twist, pull and rub his Dick - driving Keith wild. Both men are trying
to keep their moans and grunts low to avoid calling any attention to their private,
draped off world. They are aware of the world outside their room, but neither
of them cares anymore. David continues stroking Keith, kissing, licking and
biting his neck, behind his ear, his earlobe. He wants so badly to push Keith
to the floor and fuck him hard - that will have to wait till later. “Jesus,
David, so close. I'm . . . so . . . close,” Keith murmurs. “I know,
baby, I can feel it,” David replies. David continues his now feverish stroking
of Keith's cock, with his other hand he removes Keith's hand from its task,
places it against the wall and begins to stroke himself so they will climax
together.
“Oh God. Baby. Mmmmmm. MMmmmmmm. Oh, yeah Baby,” Keith's voice trembles as he whispers to David. David frantically works his own erection until finally - they explode simultaneously. David collapses against Keith, who has come to rest against the wall. David manages to gather his strength and, with his pants still around his ankles, stumbles to the couch and grabs some Kleenex from the box on the table - wipes himself off and zips up his pants. He wipes off Keith's back and ass, where his own explosion landed. Keith stumbles to the couch to clean himself off, zip up his pants and put himself back together. David grabs more Kleenex to wipe Keith's cum off the wall - “Might leave a stain,” he thinks, smiles for a moment then says to himself, “A nice reminder.”
The realization of what he just did suddenly hits David like a ton of bricks
falling off the back of a dump truck traveling down a well-worn road at about
a hundred miles an hour.
“Jesus, I almost fucked my boyfriend at my own father's wake!! What the hell is the matter with me??” David's thoughts are displayed on his face quite clearly to anyone intimate enough with him to read them. Keith watches him - watches the shock, dismay, self-loathing cross David's beautiful face. He was afraid David would regret his actions. Keith waited and watched as David ran through his emotions.
David couldn't remember ever feeling quite so . . . dirty. Even the first time he had been with Keith had not made him feel this way. Sure - he'd doubted what he was doing then, but his feelings and raw attraction to Keith had overshadowed any belittling he might have bestowed on himself. No - this was different. This was David - dependable, reliable, responsible, calm, cool, collected David - completely losing control in a draped-off room outside of which lay the body of his dead father and the relatively unknown entities of his mother, brother and sister.
It suddenly occurred to David that he was not alone. Keith. David had, for the last several wrenching minutes, completely forgotten about Keith. Standing a few feet away from him, cum filled Kleenex still in hand, David, mouth open as if about to speak, looked at Keith and started to sob. Keith had his arms wrapped tightly around David in a matter of seconds. “Shhh, David,” he whispered in his ear. As he held him, Keith felt David's body shudder, the sobbing ripping from David's inner sanctum and traveling directly into Keith's. He couldn't hold him close or tight enough.
How could he comfort this man??? How could he alleviate some of his pain and make David know, make him understand, make him SEE how damned beautiful he was???
They stood there, David enveloped in the warm embrace of this man who loved him. This man was quite possibly the only person in David's small existence that really loved him - despite knowing him intimately. Keith was willing to stand there and hold David forever, if that was what David needed. He felt David crumpling under the weight of all his emotions though, and gently steered him to the couch.
Keith sat down, pulling David down with him. Cradling David in his arms, head resting against his shoulder, arm across Keith's chest, Keith let David cry until the tears were done. His right arm around David, Keith gently stroked David' s arm, his face, his hair with his left hand. The touch was so gentle and caring David wondered how he could ever doubt the depth of his feelings for this man. But so often it seemed he did, when actually it was his own self-esteem and confusion that lay at the center of that doubt.
When he thought David could hear and understand him, Keith spoke softly. It was only a whisper but it rang in David's ear like a sonic boom. “I love you, David. Everything will be okay.”
Were those the words David needed to hear to remove the shame he felt for wanting to fuck, and nearly doing so, his boyfriend at his own father's wake?? “Keith,” David started. “Ssshhhhhhhh, baby.” Keith stopped him from saying anything more, placing his fingertips over David's lips. He tipped David's face to look into his eyes, red and wet from crying, and thought he' d never looked more beautiful than he did at that moment. “David, you are so damned beautiful. Why can't you see that?? Why can't you see what I see?” Keith said. Before David could argue the sentiments, Keith quieted him with a soft kiss. As he ran the tip of his tongue over David's lips, still holding David's face with his hand, he heard it. The sigh.
To anyone else it might have indicated dejection, but Keith knew it to be David's surrender to him. Surrendering to his feelings, his emotions, to accepting himself as human and frail.
They sat there, David wrapped in the comfort and warmth of Keith's arms, for what seemed like days. Neither spoke. David was calmed by the rise and fall of Keith's chest, the sound of his heartbeat as David' s head rested there, Keith's hand rubbing his arm, his back.
David welcomed and accepted the love he knew Keith was offering. His acceptance of David was unconditional in that moment. He understood now that his earlier actions were born of sadness, frustration and feeling so alone. David still felt a little dirty about it - more an automatic reaction than necessarily a judgment - but, wrapped in the arms of love, David opted to put those thoughts out of his mind and allow himself the overwhelming experience of just being accepted, being loved, being wanted by another.
For more fiction by Nightstick, please email the littledeaths webgal and she will forward your request. This section of littledeaths/6FU is under construction.
read Painted Love by Peachluv....a David & Keith lovesex story
read The Picnic by Nightstick with Peachluve...a David & Keith lovesex story